Thursday, April 17, 2008

It's Never Been Done Before

Never in all my born days have I seen something like this. Well, not to this impeccable level of care and detail. There has never been anyone on earth who has done such a spectacular job... of cleaning the bathroom.

Apparently that's what I was supposed to say, anyway.

I came home the other day and Scott announced (with all due pomp and circumstance) that he had finally** cleaned the bathroom. I said "thanks" and went on my merry way - unloading groceries, changing my clothes and cooking dinner. He sat down and read a book for a bit, then the following conversation happened:

    Scott: Well did you even look?
    Me: Look at what?
    Scott: The bathroom, did you look at the clean bathroom.
    Me: No, is there something special about it, aside from it being clean?
    Scott: Yeah, I really cleaned it. I mean really, I even wiped down the baseboards.
    Me: Wow, it must be cleaner than ever. (Do you sense the sarcasm here?)
    Scott: Well it's just really clean and you should go look at it, that's all.

Later I went to inspect his handy work. The bathroom was indeed clean, no cleaner than I leave it, but nice and clean. Then I noticed a few minor details...

1. He only cleaned one of the bathrooms, the one he uses.
2. There is no way he could have washed the floor - the mop was dry, the swiffer was still in the closet and I know he didn't do it by hand.
3. The shower was still dirty.

So I guess what I'm saying is if anyone would like to see a really clean bathroom, they should not come to my house.

Oh and in case you were wondering, the vacuum cleaner is still sitting in the middle of the dining room, in homage to all the hard work he did last time he "cleaned" the house.

Current Music: Scotty Doesn't Know - Lustra

** When he says finally he means because on my one day off in the last two weeks I should have cleaned it. When I say finally it means, he's been home for almost two weeks and it's taken him this long.


for a different kind of girl said...

Sympathies, oh, such sympathies...I quit cleaning the bathroom my husband and boys use.

Sadly, that means "quit" as in "How can you stand it anymore? I guess I'll clean it now..."

Bronwyn said...

Wow. I don't even know how you haven't drowned him in his own bath water by now!

Mandy Lou said...

May-b - two easy answers
1. We don't actually have a bathtub
2. I'm too pretty to go to jail ;-)

Lori said...

The sad part is he really believed he did a good job didn't he?

Once I asked Todd to watch our son for 15 minutes so I could run to the post office while he was home for lunch. When I returned he said to me "your welcome".
I replied "Oh, Im sorry, let me go out and get you a thank you card from Hallmark for doing for 15 minutes what I do all day."

Men are so clueless.

kimmyk said...

i always love it when jamie will say something like "i broke down and did...." whatever buddy. i do that shit every week. it's time you did some of the work your damn self.

whatever. lol.

men they kill me. freakin' kill me.

Just Laura said...

Typical - oh so very typical. Do they all go to some class or something? You know, when they hauled all of us girls away to a seperate class in 5th grade...

They are just too good @ being clueless not to have taken some sort of courses. Theories of the Stereotypical Clueless Human Male 101

Anonymous said...

I love him, he sounds just like my husband....who used to do all the vacuuming, I mean I was talking his butt up to everybody. But now that he only has one day off a week, I'm doing it. I bet he never does it again...

Scoobers said...

this post actually stressed me out for you.

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